Going Online, After Sleep

I was supposed to be sleeping right now, never intended to get up so early. I could've only woke up at 7 plus. But as I was sleeping just now, I felt something heavy creeping on my arms. Before that I heard my alarm but as usual didn't wake up straight away. So lazying around is always the best thing to do. Until that happened, I jumped up from my bed and swung my hand to see what was it. Turned on the lights and yes, the famous Mr. Rat. Fcuked! It was crawling on my arm! My goodness. He ran to the my sisters room on the other side. My goodness. What's that all about! I don't even know how he get to be in my room in the first place. Shit.

So here am I sitting in front of the PC. Doing nothing. I started realizing that, if you were to wake up in the middle of the night, or morning, before the sun rises.. you will realize you have no friends, and coming online to surf the web, is just so dead, so lifeless (of course, the speed goes faster) but you really don't feel much of going online in the afternoon. Luckily, I still have John talking to me in MSN. John is a very hardworking boy. Keep it up, man!

Damn the friggin' rat.

Holding On To My Dreams

I should be doing my assignments now. But I ended up writing a lyrics. I hope to get the most perfect melody for it, so that everyone can share my dreams, together :)

It's been a while,
Since I've last been here,
In this beautiful scenery,
Of many peoples' cheers.

Though I'm far but I can feel,
Every single force and spirit,
And that's whats' keeping me,
Holding on to my dreams.

I've held on to my dreams,
For as long as it can be,
From the day I let it out,
To each and everyone of you,
Where all of you cheer,
When there is no fear,
And I know it's a sign,
This is where I'm meant to be.

I can't do it all by myself,
If it's not for the confidence,
And all of the strength given,
That's what's helping me to strive,
To keep my dreams alive.

WWW

No, you're wrong. It's not World Wide Web. Let me reveal the truth to you. It's what I call Work Work Work. Yes, it's going to be a very hectic week. From tomorrow onwards, I shall start my projects and assignments together with a lil bit of song composing. Hopefully I have the inspiration to write good ones. About my assignments, they suck. They suck big time. But I'll just do it. I won't let the sucky feeling bring me down. Who's the man? I'm the man.

Who's the man?

So I see everybody's starting to push themselves
To create atmospheres everybody's talking about
To achieve what they have always been dreaming of
Rather to sit around and to look up to the sky above
Now no one's gonna leave you behind
Now no one's gonna talk to you one kind
Cos everybody wants to be the man
Everybody wants to be the perfect man
So if you're asking me if I can
If I can be the perfect man
I won't care a bit to what you're saying man
Cos you'll know what I'll become in the end
Then I'll ask you this, "Now who's the man?"

Now let me just tell you what I have in mind
What I've been observing towards things I see all the time
It is just funny to know how people starts to act
To the world where we're standing where we're living at

I know it all I know how you people's starting to be
Some trying to be innocent some trying to be as evil as they can be
Burning trees down taking lives of many people there's just so much more
I don't think I can list them down, now can't you see them clearly?
It's just the little voice in us telling, "Hey, now why can't I be him?"
And the greedy feeling starts to show, "Now I wanna conquer the world, I don't wanna sit and hold my feelings"
Now if you are able to see what I'm seeing
What I see the world has start to becoming
Join in the thoughts and start to think again
If what we see in the news is worth watching

Now who's the man, just tell me who's the man
And if you can take them down and bring it to an end
Now who's the man, just tell me who's the man
And if you can take them down and bring it to an end

Ke shi, ke shi wo men zhen de hen qi guai
Zhem me ying wei yao di yi, ren hui kai shi xiang bu kai
Di qiu de shen ling, di qiu shuo you de dong xi
Bu shi gai bao liu ma, zhem me hui xiang fan bei cai kai
Qian shi juan bu wan, qian shi yong yuan juan bu wan
Wei he yao ba zhi ji qu jao ma fan

To be continued...

A Face Never To Be Seen Again

I could still remember the first time I saw him, with a red-ribbon tied around his neck, he's furry and fat, very quiet and shy. Looks like a cub. So we named him BearBear. He's always shy but after days gone by, he became hyperactive and aggressive but still cute as ever. Though he bit part of my car's mudguard off and my Dad's.. but he's still loved always.

BearBear is never obedient. When he's asked to come back home, he will not look at you. Especially when our gate is opened, he will rush out of the house to run around. Indeed, he acts like a stray dog but he's still an animal and he's still so young. He eats a lot, he likes to play but I was never there to run around or walk with him outside our house. Probably that is the reason why BearBear acts like that, play all by himself. Everyone in the house feels angry for what he has done to our slippers and our house's walls. How he scratched the paint off and my car, and mudguards.. and how he poo everywhere. But isn't that what animals do? Maybe he did it too much, but I guess that's the price one got to pay when they want a pet.

All of those will stop starting from today. At this very moment, I felt as if I just 'killed' BearBear. Mom said she wanted to give BearBear away, but I didn't response to what she said, and because she told me she'll ask around if anyone would want to have a pet, I didn't do what I'm supposed to do. I let BearBear played around as usual. Yesterday when we got back from Genting, BearBear ran out from the house again, without looking back when he's name is called, as usual. So Dad let him out cos after few hours BearBear will be back for sure. As predicted, he did. Dad let him in this morning around 6 plus in the morning. Heard Dad scolding BearBear this morning. Then heard Dad said that BearBear wanted to bite him back.. Dad claimed BearBear to be crazy but we know he might just be lonely and that's why he reacted that way. I didn't do anything nor respond. I just went off to class after that.

When I got back just now, BearBear's kennel wasn't there. BearBear wasn't there as well. I asked Mom what happened, and she told me Dad sent him elsewhere this afternoon cos he rushed out from our house again when Dad opened the gate. They don't know where Dad sent BearBear to, but I'm sure it wouldn't be a place with shelters. Yes, BearBear might become one of the stray dogs we see around everywhere. I felt so, so bad. I could've sent BearBear to shelter homes for dogs. I didn't. Now that he's gone, how am I going to face the rest of the days without feeling any better? I don't know. I'm mad, I'm angry, worse of all, where's my responsibility? I bear the responsibilities to take care of a pet. Just when we couldn't take care of him, and make him just less aggressive and hyperactive, BearBear is sent off to a place which no one knows.

I wonder what BearBear is doing now, is he safe, or is he not..

"The hardest to face in life, is to see loved ones leaving our sight.." - ericlim 10th May, 2005

A Brand New Start

3rd/4th March 2005

The unofficial launching of my single. A song composed by me and Danny, lyrics written together with Soh Ling. Done in less than one week time. Title of the song, "Yuan Lai Wo Jui Ai De Ren Jiu Shi Ni Bu Shi Ta". Direct translation, "You're Still The One I Love Most".

A brand new start for me. Will be graduating this July. As I always say, let's hope everything goes smoothly. Thank you all. God Bless.

Ahahaha this is really not my style of writing weh. Anyway, hope those who have listened to it before, enjoy it as much as I do!

P/S: Will be heading down to Ipoh later for Astro Talent Quest 2005 Heat, and Penang on Sunday. It will be my first time singing my single to the public. I wish myself all the best. Won't be able to celebrate Mother's Day with Mom but I'm glad she liked the OSIM product I got for her and Dad. I can see it from their face :) I will earn more and get them a chair massager in time to come. I promise. Happy Mothers Day, Mom *hugs*

This P/S is a bit long but heck, the title says it all. It will be a brand new start for me, mostly everything I do. I will go to arcade lesser, will study better, will accompany my loved ones more, will speed lesser, will hold my anger better, will work harder in my career, will sleep more, will spend more *oops* spend lesser I mean, and a whole lot more. Will be a better Eric Lim, a better ME :)